Bio

I got back my Biology test results today.

The teacher was beyond the usual compliments.

"Michelle, you got 90?"
"Erm, yes."

She went on to tell the class.

"I couldn't believe she got 90."
"She was sleeping."
"I thought she wasn't even going to attempt it."
"I was so surprised when I marked her paper."
"Her answers were actually correct!"

Hearty compliments, no?

Whadd'ya know, sleeping is the way to go.
I'll be sleeping my way to success from now on.


Classes = sleep.


I see a bright future coming.

Newspapers

"Extra extra! Don't bother reading just buy it we don't care."

Today I found out I've officially joined the school's corporation (sounds grand don't it), on the board and in charge of newspapers.
I don't know what came over me when I volunteered for the interview but I'm sure it was for the cert that would come along with this job at the end of next year with referrals for future enployers full of praise, she's one fine newspaper girl, ah yes all types of paper she'd sell, blank, printed, crushed, recycled, rotting, everything.

Of course there's a hitch, the teacer advisor says if sales don't increase I can forget about my cert and SuperPaperGirl title altogether but if there's even a one cent increment I can rest assured and die happy for the cert will be mine and mine to keep unless of course, I would like to sell it.

I'll be in my room practicing alluring and magnetic voices so I can better trap suckers into buying my paper, if anyone's looking for me.

What

Nalini came in today and said the essay we wrote in the Dark Ages would count in our montly exam.
La-di-la, what d'ya know, one paper less to write.
I think, isn't life good and smile but all that changes when my book comes back and I see what's inside.

"Your style is unique but don't get carried away."


I don't know what she means by carried away because I've been born writing like this and do I get carried away no I don't get carried away please tell me I don't but even if you do think I get carried away it has nothing to do with me so why should I bother with what you think?

Haha so I digress.
I know I'm long-winded.

But I can't understand why she gives lower marks to people I think deserving and grades as high as sin to people whose writing is the death of me because its so boring I can't wait to turn the page, finish reading it, smile and say, what wonderful piece of work.

Mabye if I write common and boring and use big pretentious words and twist and turn my writing till its a labyrinth of plots and as complicated as onion rings I'll score and get grades fit for a king, make the world proud get a Nobel for literature and not understand what I wrote.

Foodfest-less

This scary big yet short teacher is going to kill me tomorrow.
This scary big yet short teacher will look at me and ask so what have you got.
This scary big yet short teacher will glare at me when I say nothing I found out nothing.

She will ask why, and when I tell her I its because I skipped school she with her lips that will pucker up like something sour and eyes which will grow small and beady will stare at me till I'm a jelly all over and till my brains turn mush.

I'll tell her, I'm sorry but I wasn't feeling well I had the rash, and you'd think she understand with her nodding her head and smiling benignly down at me with my mush brains and jelly legs but you can see that she's angry beneath all the head nodding and smiles.

I'd want to run away but I know I can't with the jelly legs and all so I smile and make up prices for the food and tell her its nice good cheap food, nice good cheap food everyone will like.

Nice good cheap food.

Where in the world can I find nice good cheap food the world will love in 3 hours?
Anyone out there fancy brain mash and jelly legs?

KL KL

Few days ago chatting.

"Come back this weekend?"
"Nah, no one in Ipoh misses me."


So what do you do when he comes back for the weekend and doesn't do nothing but scolds you (mildly) on Sunday morning, why didn't you go to church you lazy git I came back to see you but you're at home and now I have to leave I'm on the bus and I didn't get to see you and what did I tell you nobody in Ipoh misses me.

You're so surprised you can't say anything and when you do all you can throw out is why dincha tell me?
It's a surprise visit, he says, no one knew I was coming home.

It gets worse when your mother comes along and smiles and says, your good friend is home and all you can do is smile back at her when you're inwardly sad and say how's his hair?
Looks the same to me.
Aw, mum.
Aw, I didn't notice.

I say to him please, no more surprises and I miss you loads so what is this about Ipoh not missing you cause aren't I from Ipoh?
I may be from Jupiter but I'm living in Ipoh, more's the pity.

And I'll be missing you alot.

Cracking

I think I'm cracking up.
As in not the good way.

I get annoyed at the most petty little problems.
One little word, one little move wrong, and boom!
Dark clouds crowd in my head.
The process is very fast.

Smile smile smile --> Deep frown --> Black expression

All this in the huge span of 5 seconds.

It affects people around me too.
They go though sli-iiiighly different phases.

Smile --> Smile --> Frown --> Ignores me

Of course, since they're secondary victims, these happen over a much much longer time span: 5 minutes.

No, mental illness doesn't run in my family. I hope.
It must be the stress.
It MUST be.

I will stop schooling and quit all tuitions, and free myself from existing problems.
I will move to the centre of KL (for starters) and live like a hermit.
I will party and shop away all my worries and yet still project an aura of hermit-ness.
I will be the Socialite Hermit.


I'm cracking up.

Caught

Its Friday night and I'm in the cinema with my mum.
Partway through the show, my phone vibrates.

Unknown number... hmm...

*Note that are loud background sounds from the movie throughout the whole conversation*

"Elo?"
"Hi, this is Y."
"Oh er, hi?"

Ouch...
I had been avoiding his calls and messages for the past week.
Just my luck.

"Hey, you don't want to friend me anymore?"

Yup, totally, we're still back in Primary 1.
I don't wanna friend ya.

"Erm, no. I've been running a bit low on credit recently, sorry."
"Nevermind. Are you somewhere?"
"Yeah, I'm watching a movie."
"Where? Jusco or Parade?"
"Jusco."
"What time does it end?"
"I don't really know."
"What time does it end?"
"I don't know..!"

And he blabs on.

"Hey, sorry, but I'm in the cinema."
"Yes I know."

And on.

"Hello, I'm in the cinema."
"I know. So what time will the movie end?"
"I've told you, I don't know. I'm in the cinema."
"So?"
"So I can't really talk right now. Mabye I'll contact you later?"
"But you don't have credit."

Man is he exasperating.

"I'll use my friend's phone."
"Use your friend's phone? Can meh? Wha--"
"Yes yes, I'll will. I've got to go. I'm in the cinema. I can't talk here."
"Oh. Bye."


He is a nagging old woman in disguise, I know.
A clear winner for the Amboi-Makcik-ni throphy.

Holed

There's a hole in my head.
No don't worry its not spouting blood I've got a wine bottle stopper innit.
Or would you rather have my head pour out bloody wine for you?

*Pulls out wine stopper*

Whoops sorry you came too late, the yeast has decided; you're not gonna get drunk on my brain juice cause' I need me braincells about me.
Before they run out I would just like to ask this of you: forgive me.

Yes, I beg your forgiveness.
Forgive me for any stupidity on my part, any incoherence, any daftness and the like for I have a closed-up hole in my head and am losing my gray cells bit by bit.

A-ha a-ha there you go; she's crazy you say, what's all this about holes in heads?

But you're wrong.
I HAVE a dent on my head.
Very like a crater.
Even more like some teeth imprint.

Now my head is imbalanced (I feel);
it tilts to the left.
I will forever walk lopsided,
and people will blame it on heavier earings on my left ear, though I don't wear any.

Through all these trials,
I will forever remember Jacqulyn.

She had very kindly left those memorable teeth marks on my head.

Teacher teacher

"She's so insulting."
"That fat-assed bitch."
"She hates us I know."

It is confirmed; (most of) my classmates find happiness and contentment in reaching out to one another.
(Wow we 4 Lilians are such a close-knit group)
They group together, invoke feelings of a hurt and grieving nature, blame it on the teacher, and
(surprise surprise)
they complain.

Again.
And again.
And again.

Their never-ceasing, erm, ability, to find fault with this particular teacher is awe-inspiring.
If I could summon and focus so much energy and attention to one particular matter like them, wow.
I'll be the Tokoh Pelajar for years to come.

But no, I have this stinking suspicion that this ability only comes out of spite and a need for self-justification.
What a pity.

They should all shut their trap; just shut up.
I am so tired of hearing the same things over and over again.
I know its happening yeah, and I accept it.
Its life.
The teacher's human.

Or mabye I'm just from Jupiter.

Dying

I don't get it.
Why are there so many young people dying these days?
Why are they robbed of life when they have just reached its peak?
Why why why?

Even worse still are people who commit suicides.

My brother related to me a suicide which happened near his digs.
The girl killed herself because, (oh wow lets gasp and cry) her boyfriend left her.
We agreed, there was only one word to describe her: stupid.

No surprise there, its happens all the time.
This class of stupid people intimidates me.
Such narrow-mindedness is scary.
I'd rather not talk about it anymore.

If anyone of you out there wants to die, please, do us all a favour and get a life.

Sorry

This post will be dedicated to LingSim.
Totally.
I'll be writing about her.
Before your run away to puke, hold it all in and read this first.

She's one stupid-ass girl.

Okay, now you can go puke.
Done? Read on.

I hereby extend my apologies for sort of, sort of, SORT of forgetting your birthday.
Really, I remembered!
Just that I... forgot.

I forgot this sweet and cute (err...) girl's birthday.
This girl who has been a wonderful friend all these years, who has never (sort of) forgotten my birthdays, who was there to comfort me when I was down, who was there to pull me down when I was up high, and be a pain in the arse when she talks about ugly Taiwan singers.

Will you ever forgive me?

Will you ever listen to my ramblings again?
Will you ever give me stupid advice again?
Will you ever crap about your "husbands" to me again?
Wil you ever talk about bamboo sticks again?

 
Of course you will.
What am I thinking of?

Happy Birthday, girl.

***

- please consider this your bday present. this is straight from the heart and i'm broke. -

In hiding

School's out and I have no where to hide.
No, there are no bullies after me.
Just Mr. Y.
 
He did the expected; he asked me to be his girlfriend.
I'm not being perasan, it was kinda obvious.
So says everyone who saw him yesterday.
He is the type of guy, after finding out your name, "feels" it in his bones; we are soulmates he thinks.
 
I no longer have any excuse to ignore him.
Hm, mabye I can have tuition?
I should just go to sleep.
 
I don't know how to say no.
I can't say no to a fly if my life depended on it.
 
 
I really ought to learn.

Dot in, dot out

Dot dot dot dot dot.
Dot dot.
 
No, I'm not missing Dorothy so much till I've gone bonkers.
 
Its just that: dots.
On me.
These are man-made dots, self-generated by the wretched piece of work I call my body.
 
I'm having an allergic reaction.
Allergic reactions on a person who has no known allergies.
Will wonders ever cease.
 
And its no normal allergy rash.
 
Its shy.
 
It disappears when people are around; namely my mum and the doctor.
It comes round again when I'm all alone.
I'm alone most of the time.
No, wait, I have my rash to teman me.
 
The doctor thinks its my dinner.
My mum thinks its wine.
 
"What did you eat? Oh, were you drinking wine yesterday?"
"Huh wine? Why would I drink wine at 2am?"
"I don't know. You like wine."
 
Yes mum, I pop open a bottle of wine early in the morning and drink till I'm drunk and get a rash that's shy and a hangover to accompany me so I can skip school and suffer for the rest of the day.
 
Of course, how could I forget, its in vouge.
People do it all the time.
 
 
 
Scratch scratch scratch.
 
If this doesn't stop soon I'll bleed to death from all the bleeding pores I've scratched open.
 
Scratch.

Awkward

Yesterday I got a message: Do you remember me, I'm from blah blah blah.
 
I was sleeping when it arrived (what else?).
First thought, ignore the moron.
But then...
 
-1 message received-
-1 missed call-
-2 messages received-
-3 missed calls-
 
So I replied.
 
"No, I don't know who you are."
"I'm one of the two science students."
 
Oh wow, that cleared things up.
I am supposed to remember one of two science students from a bunch of guys I never really got to talk to and saw only once, months ago?

I'm touched; people think so highly of my memory skills.
Those poor misguided people.
 
"I'm sorry, but I still can't remember who you are."
"I'm not the thin one."
"Oh. Okay..? Mabye you could send me a photo or something? Coz I'm still blur right now."
"Are you free tomorrow? Want to go for a movie?"
 
Sarah was there when he messaged, she said we could all go for a movie together, with Joe and Kingker too.
So okay. I agreed.
Now he would finally leave me in peace.
Or so I thought.
 
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
"No."
"Good."
 
That should have set off my internal alarms ringing, but no.
Stupid me just thought it was public-spirited curiosity.
 
Come today, Joe and Kingker couldn't make it, movie tickets were sold out.
At 10.30 in the morning.
What to do? He wouldn't take no for an answer.
 
"Oh, anything will do, you decide."
 
If I had my way we would all be sleeping at home.
 
I did my superwoman act, got Ming Yuen and Dick Xiang to come, and settled everything.
 
We were walking towards the cafe where we were supposed to meet this guy, when Ming Yuen and Dick Xiang left us for Capcom (arcade). 
 
Sarah and me, we were so nervous.
This guy walked up and said hi, we were all like he-haw he-haw, ha-ha-ha so its you.
I remember standing there and thinking, I don't know this guy!
But I smiled like we were best buddies for 10 years anyway.
 
He led us to his table, where his friends were.
Mr. Smirks and Miss Never-Blink.
They were staring at me like I was some sort of alien species.
Roll roll roll.
Their eyes followed me around in symphony.
Roll roll roll.
 
"Hi, I'm Michelle."
 
More smirks and never-blinking stares.
 
Silence.
 
Sarah pulled me aside.
 
"This is so weird!"
"I know. Faster call for backup."
"I did. They'll be coming in 3 minutes and 15 seconds. Act like its coincidental."
 
We met up with them and went for a drink at Coffee Bean.
Mr. Smirks and Miss Never-Blink left us to get some private bonding time.
Thank God.
By this time I was fairly sick of them all.
(I mean the three unknowns)
 
I just wanted to chill with my friends!
 
We couldn't click, so all of us just sat round the table and smiled randomly.
What is this, "tap thoi" ?
 
Later we saw Daphne and Kin Mun; they were like angels to me and Sarah, because Ming Yuen and Dick Xiang had left us alone with him again.
Daphne and Kin Mun laughed like it was nobody's business when I told them about him (make him Y).
What friends!
 
We saw Mr. Smirks and Miss Never-Blink, and Y practically ran to their side.
I seized the chance, and fled in the opposite direction.
 
Free from him at last! Hahaha.
I started to relax.
Smile, laugh, ha ha ha, then boom!
He was behind me.
 
It sucked big time.
I had to take action.
With Daphne acting as my lesbian partner, I bid my adios.
 
20 minutes later he asked me out next week.
 
***
 
I'm way past caring what other people think.
Call me a social outcast. Anything.
From now, I'm going to stay at home.
Never will go out with people who claim to know me again.
 
If you don't know me now, you probably never will.

Brownies

Perfect, brown, chocolatey, moist, crisp brownies.
Totally decadent.
Sarah and I, we made it.
We did, we really baked them.
 
We poured the flour, the walnuts.
Cracked the egg.
Added the water.
Mixed in the oil.
 
And stirred.
Now don't look down on the stirring part, it was ESSENTIAL.
We owe our perfect-licious brownies to just that: stirring.
 
Instructions: Stir 50 whole complete times, incorporating the whole batter.
 
Sounds tough, I know.
I mean, "50 whole times"?
Must be the weirdest instructions ever.
And stupidest.
People just stirred until their hands and batter were one.
But no, we had to stir it just 50 times.
(whole complete ones for that matter)
 
So stir we did.
 
"1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7......... 29, whoops, what was that again? 25? Okay. 25, 26, 27..."
 
Err, mabye we modified it just a leetle leetle bit.
*looks guilty*
But hey, it turned out just fine!
Don't look at me like that.
 
After many many trials and tastings, we passed.
Our brownies were declared "addictive".
 
We are now confirmed stirring experts.
 
So what if we used a pre-packaged mix?

Its Saturday again

Its Saturday and Sarah's coming over.
Sarah's coming over and my room is a mess.
 
So I thought, launch Operation Un-Mess.
I thought again, forget Operation Un-Mess and get on with sleeping.
(I slept at 6.30am, woke 7, 8, 9 and 10am - all failed attempts to wake early) 
 
Tiny voices started tittering in my head.
 
"Move it, start cleaning!"
"Sleep, loads more time."
"Wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up!"
 
I hauled ass and started up the vacuum cleaner.
 
*Continuous buzzing sound*
 
Man its hard to suck up everything when you're sitting plonk in the middle of the room trying to reach every corner without moving.
This needs expertise.
Which, sadly, I did not possess.
I had to move.
 
=(
 
 
Move move move move.
Up right down left.
Zap away all nasty dirty things.
Slurp them all up, me trusty vacuum buddy.
Slurrrrp.
 
Ah, I feel so womanly.
 
 
I feel old.
 

Sleepless

One whole week has come and gone.
One whole week of boring and sleepy-fying classes, done with.
One whole week of temptations to sleep in class.
 
But did I stumble in my journey to reach the coveted no-sleeping-in-class status?
No man!!
I stayed awake the whooole week!
Yup, I kept awake even through the greatest challenge of all : a double-shot of Maths early early in the morning.
(Actually I was busy copying my chemistry PEKA off someone, but that hardly matters; the point is I stayed awake)
 
I feel contented.
 
 
Err, wait, did I mention, I had a couple of winks between my biology and add. maths classes today?
 
No?
Whoops.
 

Stress

I was at the bio lab, and I had to do this long and somewhat boring experiment.
We (my groupmates and me) had some food samples to test, and we had to mash them all into bits before we could start the testing.
 
Bam bam bam!
Mash mash mash.
 
I was, um, mashing a piece of meat.
My teacher wanted it in crumbs (ha-ha?).
No kidding.
 
Bam!
 
All class of raw meat is disgusting.
I knew that ages ago, but this beats it all.
It wasn't just red and raw, but it was flabby.
It looked like a piece of what was an overweight chicken.
Flab flab flab.
Very disgusting.
Deserves to be hit.
 
Bam!
Bam!
 
You disgust me chicken.
 
Bam!
 
I feel like puking, but crumbs she said, so crumbs it'll be.
 
Bam!
 
Somehow it felt sooo good pulverising the flabo meat that won't crumble.
Yea man, let it all go.
Pound away your stress and worries.
 
Bam bam bam bam bam!
 
"Stop it Michelle, you're too ganas! You'll break everything."
 
Bam!
 
"Stop!!"
 
Amnah takes the pestle away from me and mashes the meat herself.
Gently.
It just breaks my heart.
The meat needs me!
 
Ah well... it'll survive.
 
 
 

Stopping

My mum has banned me from eating so much rojak.
Me being the good filial daughter I am, I agreed.
I'm going to stop eating so much rojak.
Yup, you read right. I'm stopping.
Surprise surprise.

Read again.

I said "so much".
I said "going to".

So, it really means:

I so love rojak and I'm gonna eat it whenever I can I don't care what you say mum I don't care what you anti-rojak morons tell me I know its crazy to eat so much I know its not healthy but man its just so goo-ood It will be the death of me I can feel it in my bones I know I'll die eating it.


It's my evil rojak loving subconscious mind speaking.
I'm weakening by the minute.
The rojak molecules are too powerful.
Helllp... mummy...!...

It's taking over me.

*Uhhh...bloop*
(Help meh...)


Hello hello hello. If you would like to help Michelle out, please send her a packet of rojak (large if possible).
Everytime you sit down to a plate of rojak, please think of Michelle.
Think of poor rojak starved Michelle.
The poor poor thing.

So to help reduce the suffering in this world, immediately send the plate of rojak to Michelle. At the very least ask her to join you. Your kindness will be very much appreciated.

***

So anyone up for rojak?

Running?

The phone rang again at 10+.
Stupid phone.
Can't a girl sleep in peace?

Idiot that I am, I took the call, eventhough my mum was just about to make an excuse for me.
Turned out to be my ex. I didn't recognise his voice at first, but then he demanded that I tell him who he was.

"Do you know who am I anot?"
"No."
"Wei, you don't recognise me?"
"No."
"Are you awake?"
"No."
"Do you know who is this?"

Terpaksalah think think sikit. Ouch my poor head.
Wasn't interested in chatting, so I just said, sleep sleep sleep, and goodbye.

But I couldn't sleep anymore, so I went online and checked my mail.
. . . . . ding ding! 3 new emails.
There was one from him, titled 'hope you will read it' or something.
I'm a kind soul (haha) so I obliged.

The first line was enough to make me cringe.
"I love you more than words could say"

The first thought that popped into my mind: Oh God, not again?

I scrolled straight to the last line of the very long and irrelevant, cut and pasted "love poem".
"No one could ever make us part. - xxx"

Goosebumps galore.
Hello?? If you have an "ex" label, it means that "us" is already "me" and "you".
In other words, parted. Get it? Geddit?

*Beep beep*
New message, him again.

I need to sleep.


*****

It has come to my attention (ouch I sound like my headmistress) that this post has created controversy(!?). Well, abit mabye. So I'll try to make this clear. This post was/is not meant to offend anyone. If anyone got offended (or basically anything unpleasant) reading this post (physically, mentally, emotionally...err, anything else?) then I'm sorry.

I'm just a blogger. I write what I think.

*****

Sleeping

Like the pig I am, I've been sleeping my life away.
Slowly... rotting away.
This sucks worse than listening to PuiYun.

I miss the life I used to live.

I'm gonna stop sleeping so much.
No! Don't laugh, me being serious here.
Hahahahahahaha.
Whoops, serious. Serious. Yeah.

People, help me out.

*****

I was happily asleep (no more of this I assure you) when my house phone started ringing. Urgh.
Opened my eyes, saw nothing.

Brain sends out message: Time for school. Get up get up. You didn't finish your homework, get up! Phone ringing, get up!

Typical of a non-functioning brain.

Anyways I dragged myself over to the phone, and groggily...

"Lo?"
"Hi, is Michelle here?"
"Huh? Oh, yah, it's me."
"Kuppu here la, what homework did you get today?"

What homework? Huh? My brain sent panic signals. She meant the work my teachers dish out everyday, but me being me, I don't bother listening.

"Err, got ah? Hmm, err...."
"Okla, English?"
"Summary..."
"Maths?"
"Whiteboard."
"That stupid lady."
"Yea, and no more."

The conversation went on to more interesting stuff, but all I could do was to say yea, yes, yeah the whole time. That's brainlessness for you.

I found out, Kuppu and Azizi, they got fourth in the district level Perdana Quiz.
Way to go, Kinta 01!!
Way way way to go, Kuppu ZiPau! =))
We are all so SO proud of you!
Those two poor people worked their backs off for this quiz.
Cheers to them!

Btw, Kuppu sounds so sweet over the phone.
So very very sweet.
So sweet I fell asleep again at once.

People in love...

To be more precise, I mean PuiYun.
The ass has been mooning about her beloved 6-footer hunk the whole time in school. Arggh! I'm tired of listening to her. Someone please, change places with me? Doesn't she understand, there are better people in the world to me than her darling. *sigh*

But on the other hand, I'm happy for her. After all her useless and never-ending fights and breakups, she's finally (about time) openly admitting her, can I say, obsession(!), for him.

Obsession it is.
I hate it.

"Michelle, aww, he's just so cute!"
"He's so sweet!"
"He's so stupid, but that makes him even sweeter.."
"He's so cute!"
"... he's so sweet, can you believe him, he did this..."
"... so cute.."
"... so sweet..."

It goes on and on, but you get the gist.
And all this in only one day. Thinking bout tomorrow gives me the creeps. Urgh.

Talk anymore PuiYun, and I'll fall for him. (har-har?)
Better to just sHut uP.

=)

Cookin'

Yup, so I cooked.
Saturday's turning into my very own personal cook-a-thon day.
Is this a good thing?
I don't know. Cooking is fun, but tiring.
Definitely not your everyday thing. For me, at least.

I did what my mum told me to, and more.
I changed the recipe to my liking.
White wine? Out of white wine; red will do.
More more more more! Wine is good. =)
But ouch, the broth turned dark purple in colour.
Hm, mabye it was a teeny wee bit too much?

A little while later, I tried the broth.
Walau, salty to the high heavens.
I decided to ignore it and hope for the best. =P

Three half hours later, the filling (I was making sheperd's pie) came out tasting sweet.
Bingo!
Then I baked it, with mash on top.
Somehow or other, me mum messed the baking instructions.
The potato top came out still soft, not as crisp as I wanted it.
Oh well...

It turned out to be delicious.
No, I'm not praising myself, my "victims" really said it.
My mum though, said it needed more salt. ??? (-_-')
My brother (he's in KL), again, when told : I'm so SO proud of you!
Thanks kor! Now I feel empowered! Cooking is great! I'm gonna cook every weekend!

*****

Out of the blue...
"Michelle, you should cook your pie for the caregroup meeting!"
Huh? Caregroup? No!! So many humans! It'll take forever.....
Suddenly, I feel like I never want to cook again. I'll eat out all the time.

Really.

School

On a Saturday!
How bad can it get?
Saturdays are meant for sleeping in!
The one and only day I can wake up late.
But noo-oo, they (everyone in general) MUST have co-curriculum meetings on Saturdays. Grrr.
Lucky it's only for two hours.

In the car on the way there, my mum tells me she won't be free to cook the pie she planned to make. So she thinks, never fear, trusty Michelle is here!

"Remember to slice this, cube that, chop this, marinate that...blah blah blah.."
"Urm, mum, why don't I just cook everything?"

Yeah, so now its my duty. Sigh.

*****

In school, they break the news to us.
We Girl Guides are going to be enrolled!
Ranger-dom for us! =/
Don't get me wrong, I am um, so very very happy.
Just that it falls on the very day I'm supposed to go to KL.
How like me to be so lucky. Har-har.
*Sigh* Goodbye shopping spree.

So there I was, sadly thinking about all the shopping I could have done. Sad and brainless.
Boom! All of a sudden I found myself, together with Pui Khe, in charge of the food and drinks committee for the abovementioned day.
Apparently I asked for it. Hmm...
Seems that I'll have to call up some caterers, find out the prices, plan the menu, collect the money, order the cake... in short, make sure food is served on that day.

Fellow friends have even found ways to motivate me.
"There better be enough food!" But the teacher just told me to reduce the amount of food!
"The food better be good, or you'll have to tapau it all home!" Aiks!
"Make sure it's cheap, but nice." Ouch? Cheap is good enough.

Mabye they should all makan angin. Hehe.

My brother, when told: I'm so proud of you! Just don't spike the food.
Don't worry kor, they want it cheap. =P

Made my day

The substitute teacher was in at my BK (bible knowledge) class today.
A nice lady, but rather soft, in all ways. The sweet flurry middle-aged Aunt Madeline type.
Noise level is 300% more when she takes over.

So anyways, I arrived late (as usual) and skiddled over to her table to mark my attendance.

She smiled, and said, "Er, what's your name again? I can't remember, but I can recognise your smile."

Look people, my smile is recognisable!
Oh yeah, it's speciia-aaal...!
I damn well hope the "special" is in a good way.

For now, I'll pretend it's the "good special". hehe.

It's good for my self-esteem, so just shut up and stop telling me that I'm being perasan. I know it already!

=))
I can't stop smiling...

Oh gawdd...

This is the worst ever.
I hate this.
I can never go out in the open again.
I'm mortified, embarrassed beyond, totally beyond belief.

From bottom up, mostly neck, part face mouth slightly open (okay mabye not), bad hair, horrible lighting, weird position, stupid shirt, ugly model.

That's me.
The lawak case.
In a photo taken by a friend when I was floating away in dreamland.
(I'll get back at you one day Shuan! hehe.)

Apparently, a couple of hundred people saw it before me.
I hate being blur.

I hate you too.
Go away.
I'll post the pictures later.

The Teacher

"Kamu ni semua pelajar yang terbaik, terpandai dan terbilang. Tak payah lagi saya ajar, kan, ya?"


Sarcastic? Yes.
Offensive? Mabye.
To some, a huge insult.
To me, sixteen words.
Is it such a big deal?

Mabye I'm thick-skinned, or too stupid to understand; I just can't be bothered.
Why care about what some lame teacher says?
Why waste your life and hurt yourself by taking offense?
I guess I'll never know, not just yet.

Anyway, regardless of what I think, my classmates (most of them) have decided to "take action". They've formed a wonderful strategy to oust my teacher from her position.

Step 1 : Group together.
Step 2 : Complain
Step 3 : Complain
Step 4 : Complain
Step 5 : Reaffirm their wronged position
Step 6 : Complain

Ain't it just wonderful? Mind boggling tactics.

I'll never catch up.

Being single

I don't really know why, but it suddenly struck me; many people I know are in a relationship.

A friend recently said, "It must be nice to have that special someone, to hold you, to tell you sweet nothings...."

Yes it is.
But isn't it nice too, to be single?
To be free, not tied down to anyone.

Which is better?
Freedom, or security?
I can't tell.
When I have one, I want the other.
After getting it, I long for what I used to have.

Sometimes.

Laughing?

Ye-ees? Laughing.

I've finally remembered my Friendster account password.
Yup, heroic me dug it out of my messy garbage dump of a brain.
Logged in for the first time, and whoa! Totally blanko.
I've got no friends!
Could the world be a sadder place?

So anyway, I zoomed in on my friend, LingSim's page.
Oh wow. Holy cow hit me on the head with a fork of blue cheese.

*unearthly sounds*

They called the cops. But did I give a damn?
No. I was too busy laughing.
Kidding. No cops nothing. But I was laughing, yes.

Praise upon praise heaped on my ole' ole' friend.
Unbelieveable. How could people be so gullible?
Did they really know her?

Still laughing, I checked out some other friends.
Same results.
Still praises abound.
Still laughing.

More friends, less laughter.
More friends, no laughing.

Checking out yes another friend's testimonials, my happiness level dropped to zero.

Have I been missing out on all their good parts??
Am I too cynical, too sarcastic?

Mabye I'm the real ass.
Mabye..

...

So... to all my friends, I love you all. Miss you too.

Let's go yumcha makan rojak minum kopi barley suet.